Supermom complex

From the time I found out we were pregnant with our first child I have ALWAYS wanted to be a stay at home mom. But things didn't always work out the way I had hoped. In fact, many times it felt like my journey was going in the complete opposite direction. And throughout this time, I dug my heels into the ground, feeling like I've missed out on what I really wanted.

But what I've come to realize and understand is that I didn't need to be a supermom to be the best wife for my husband and the best mother for our children. I am blessed with the opportunity to work and help provide for our family:

• Proverbs 31:16-17 She considers a field and buys it, out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks

Being a working mom (outside the home), means that you need to be extra aware of what you commit to. The separation axiety (although excruciatingly painful at first), will eventually help your child be independent and confident. The 'mother's guilt' will never go away, but it will fade. Dig deep, but not in resistance - but in harmony with God's word. There's a purpose for you being in the place where you're at. Thrive where you're planted. Soak in all the goodness of the opportunities in your grasp. Learn to see these things as steps towards God's greater plan for your life.

When the anxiousness of not being enough, giving enough, doing enough attacks my mind... I'm gently reminded of my Saviour's pace and slow down to enjoy His unlimited blessings.

Tips for surviving the Supermom Complex
1. Understand your strengths
2. Understand your weaknesses
   - Ask for help (listen girls, the hubs was not created to be intuitive - he needs to know how to help  
     you. And be patient, they're not born knowing how to multi-task and won't do things like you
     would have them done. But you never know, he may have a better solution :) - mine actually did
     laundry MUCH better than I did - and I'm happy to share the responsibility)
3. DON'T Compare
   - This is your journey... own it, love it, and LIVE it
   - Remember that God's blessings will never run out - and that we are all equal in His eyes
4. Evaluate your commitments
  - Make time for quiet time (your time in God's word and in worship will change the course of
    your day... and life)
   - Make your husband your priority (even before the kids) -- you're relationship with him will ensure
    peace and balance in your home
  - Don't over schedule your children
  - Never put work before your family (work diligently, and work smart. leave 'work' and work - and
    when you're with your family, be 100% there)
  - Give (make time for the next generation, make time for the body of Christ) - you can't out give
    God

Enjoy... the Process

Romans 12:12 Be JOYFUL in hope, PATIENT in affliction and FAITHFUL in prayer

One of the things I've been consciously practicing is to enjoy the process. For so many years I followed my heartstrings and became anxious for not being where I thought I should be, not having what I thought I should have, and not being who I thought I should be. I've made a consicous effort to enjoy where I am. To be present in the here and now. To enjoy the little things, and big things, in my life. Like the hundreds of kisses I get from my kids and date nights with my husband.

Instead of trying to push towards that 'ultimately perfect' future, seek to find what life lessons can be learned through the place you are at. Instead of being anxious or frustrated with a difficult situation, look for ways to see how God is helping you grow. Life lessons that you may not have learned otherwise.

Learn to enjoy the process.  Be joyful, be patient and be faithful.